The Trench Coats and You Look Taller Myth I Finally Looked Into Properly
I bought my first real trench coat in 2019, after a woman at the till in a Leeds shopping centre told me it would “elongate” me. I am five foot…
Knee High Boots On Short Women Get Written Off Constantly, I Had Opinions
Someone once told me that if you’re under five foot four you should “steer well clear” of any boots above mid calf, because they’ll “cut the leg in half and…
I Had Opinions About Wearing a Corset Damage Your Body and Didn’t Expect To
In 2019 I told my sister corsets were medieval torture devices Victorians tricked women into wearing to rearrange their organs, and if she bought that one from the market trader…
Does Push Up Bras Actually Make Your Breasts Sag? I Went Looking For a Real Answer
My aunt Denise told me underwiring was “basically corsetry for your chest and will leave you hanging by forty” over a barbecue dinner in 2019. I was twenty six, had…
Pantyhose Got Quietly Retired By Everyone Except Me, Apparently
“This is so 2004”, people say to me occasionally when I opt for bare legs in summer and tights in winter. The refrain we’ve all heard and repeat ourselves about…
Loafers Supposedly Go Out Of Style Every Few Years, Mine Never Got The Memo
You know the moment I’m talking about. The single pair of shoes in your cupboard that you’re half-way out the door wearing one of and holding the other in your…
I Went Looking For the Truth About Whether Heels Really Causes Bunions
I was sitting in a podiatry clinic in Leeds two winters ago. One sock off, foot resting on a foam wedge and waiting for a diagnosis. “Look at this” said…
I Had Opinions About Black Trousers and Brown Shoes Go and Didn’t Expect To
I informed my sister Freya that brown shoes with black trousers was “the sort of thing that looks fine on Pinterest and terrible in a Wetherspoons car park.” Something I…
Choosing What Shoes to Wear with Maroon Dress Somehow Took Over My Entire Personality This Year
I bought some burgundy suede ankle boots to wear with a maroon wrap dress in October ’21. I wore them out for the first and only time to a work…
How I Learned to Stop Looking Like a Lost Hiker Every Time It Drizzles
I’ll be the first to admit it—I am that person. The person who has fourteen different jackets but still looks like a drowned rat whenever it rains. I research and…