Last week I learned an extremely valuable lesson about my closet during one of those mortifying experiences where you realise you look WAY worse than you thought you did. I had jumped into my closet to quickly throw on something nice for a work meeting and pulled out what I thought was a cute, sleek black blazer. I barely glanced in the mirror to cheque that I wasn’t obviously leaving the house with shirt tails sticking out or mascara smeared under my eyes.
But I didn’t really take inventory of how I looked until I was already in the lift of my office building, face-to-face with those awful reflective lift mirrors. And that’s when I knew something was wrong. I didn’t just look sad.
I looked tragically depressed. Ok, that’s harsh, but only because it’s true.
Something about how my outfit came together made me look wilted and deflated, like a balloon that had slowly lost all of its air.
My blazer was wrinkled in that way that makes it look like it’s been stuffed in the back of your closet for YEARS.
The sleeves were almost too short (wait – had they ALWAYS been that short?) The shoulders weirdly bulged when I moved my arms. And there was a small mysterious stain near my third button that I’ve been living with for YEARS.
I looked like a hot mess who’d dressed in the dark and hoped for the best. As I sadly rode up the lift to work that morning I had a sudden epiphany that this poor outfit choice wasn’t a one-time occurrence. This blazer wasn’t a unique anomaly – it was harbinger of all the “other black blazers” hanging in my closet I would describe as “good enough.” You know what I’m talking about.
The clothes that aren’t bad enough to definitely NOT wear, but aren’t exactly good clothes either. The ones you reach for when you can’t find anything else, and then feel lukewarm about how you look all day long. After that mortifying lift experience I started paying more attention to how often I settled on “good enough.” That black trousers that bunch at your waist, but hide under a belt.
That cardigan that’s perfect colour but is always itching you after you wash it. Those cute ballet flats from high school that now look like they’ve been stomped all over by the Chucky doll. All of these pieces are just “good enough” to wear, but not great enough to actually enhance your outfit.
Instead they’re occupying valuable closet space AND making you look worse than if you had left those things at home. I text my stylist friend Sarah about my theory and she LOL’d so hard. “Claire,” she wrote back, “You’ve just described what I like to call ‘the Violet Problem.’ Also known as the first thing I tackle when someone hires me because they have a closet full of clothes but never have anything to wear.” (Apparently we all have code names for our least favourite style crimes.) It turns out this problem is so pervasive that every stylist I talked to had a shorthand name for these kinds of clothes. Sarah calls them “the things that are almost but not quite.” Her stylist boyfriend Marcus calls them “compromise pieces.” One stylish friend of mine called them “low-agreement pieces” and said they’re actually worse than having obvious offenders in your closet (“You know, the super-short skirts and low-cut blouses you know you shouldn’t wear but can’t seem to quit.”) because these pieces trick you into THINKING they look good. “This stuff,” Sarah explained over drinks, “lulls you into thinking your wardrobe is okay.
You wear those clothes all the time and feel ‘good enough’ when you get dressed, so you don’t realise how LOW your standards have become. Wear enough ‘nothing fits quite right’ pieces and eventually you forget what it feels like to wear something that DOES fit right.” Ouch. She was right though.
How many times had I got dressed only to try on three or four outfits that were JUST acceptable before finally throwing something on because I was running late? How many times had I gone about my day secretly unhappy with my clothes because nothing fit perfectly or made me feel totally awesome? Hell, most of my clothes.
My brain scrolled through all my old purchases as I drank my wine. The “sale” dress I bought without trying on that was just okay and kinda bulky. The jeans that don’t hug your hips in all the right places.
The jumper that used to be soft but isn’t quite it anymore. All of these “kinda sucks, but I’ll wear it” pieces were negatively impacting how I felt about my wardrobe. And probably how I felt about myself.
Sarah’s challenge to me was to go through my closet and weed out all my “almost” pieces. Not the obvious ones that you know you should ditch (because believe me I’ve conquered that pile!) but the pernicious pieces that SNEAK INTO YOUR OUTFITS every day because they don’t fit RIGHT. Clothes in your closet that don’t make you feel amazing, but don’t immediately yell “DON’T EVER WEAR ME” either.
The purge ended up being SO depressing I actually took before and after pics. Here’s a photo of my giveaway pile: Good God. Several trash bags full of items that I wore all the time but never really looked awesome in.
Trousers that were too short. Dresses that were too tight. Too loose.
Blouses that made me feel boxy. Jackets that weren’t quite my style. Ugh, just looking at this stuff made me cringe.
But you know what was so surprising? How great I felt about what was LEFT in my closet. Because here’s the secret no one tells you about wardrobe pruning: getting rid of bad clothes doesn’t leave you with nothing to wear.
It actually makes getting dressed EASIER. Because when everything that’s left in your closet fits and flatters you, picking an outfit in the morning becomes way less stressful. Who knew?
I realised I’d been going about building a wardrobe the wrong way. Instead of purchasing pieces I LOVE wearing I’d settled for ones that were merely “good enough.” Instead of stocking my closet with clothes that made me feel amazing I’d filled it with things that were either convenient or on sale or just available in my size that season. And that “good enough” mindset was poisoning my entire wardrobe.
I hate to break it to you, but the “good enough” mindset can apply to pretty much everything in your closet. We keep those black trousers that are almost your size because black trousers are necessary for the office. We hang onto that thin white t-shirt that slips down your boobs because white tee shirts are wardrobe staples.
We wear clothes that don’t exactly feel good because they “match everything.” But what’s the point of having a closet full of “matchy-matchy” outfits if you NEVER feel amazing in anything you wear? I started to look at my wardrobe like dating (bear with me here). Would you be with a partner who was just good enough?
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Someone who met your basic criteria but didn’t get you excited? Who wouldn’t you dive into bed with every time they walked through the door? No one!
So why were you allowing that kind of nonsense into your closet? ! My biggest challenge was boxing up all of my “expensive mistakes.” Yep, I’m guilty of holding onto clothes I spent a lot of money on but NEVER loved. That designer dress I bought on super sale but never looked great in.
That expensive leather jacket that always felt too tight in the sleeves. That fancy purse you carried for special occasions but then never did because…they were ALL expensive. And my brain kept telling me I shouldn’t get rid of them because WHAT IF I LOVED THEM SOMEDAY and could wear them again?!
Ridiculous logic, of course. Sarah explained that luxe fabrics don’t somehow magically make bad outfits good. “No amount of cash spent on a garment can make it flattering if it doesn’t FIT,” she said. “I promise you’re not missing out on that someday where you’ll be happy with how YOU look wearing that designer dress. Because let me tell you something: EVERYONE looks terrible in THAT dress.
It’s not you, it’s the dress.” Oh man…she was right again. I packed up half a rubbish bag of clothes I was hanging onto for all the wrong reasons. But the last category of clothes that was surprisingly difficult to purge was what I call “dream clothes.” aka clothes I bought for the ideal version of myself rather than the real one.
That cocktail dress you swear you’ll wear to the party you’re “probably” being invited to. That hiking jacket you’re “going to need” when you buy a cabin in the woods. That blazer that made you feel like a total boss when you tried it on, but which actually isn’t cute on YOU.
I had way too many of these bad boys in my closet! Again, these weren’t ALL bad pieces. But anything that made me feel like I wasn’t living up to my best life wasn’t doing me any favours either.
Feeling insecure about your outfits isn’t cool, but adding to that insecurity by trolling yourself in the closet every time you get dressed? Priceless. BASICs.
Is there such a thing as a wardrobe staple that gives you no stilsatisfaction? I thought not. But when I polled my stylist friends it turns out basics are actually where most of us fail.
Sarah reminded me that basics are IMPORTANT and you should STRIVE to find ones that fit impeccably. “If your basics don’t fit you perfectly,” she said, “then NOTHING will. Sort of like building a house – if the foundation isn’t solid, the rest of the house isn’t going to look good either.” It was tough not to run to Amazon immediately after tossing everything I didn’t love. Sarah’s advice was to wait.
Live with the emptiness for a while and really assess what you miss versus what you THINK you should miss. Some gaps I learned I didn’t need at all. Other holes I could instantly feel in my wardrobe.
It was SUCH an eye opening exercise. Needless to say I’ve sworn off “good enough” when it comes to my closet. These days when I shop I ask myself way different questions.
Am I DYING to wear this every chance I get? Will I feel awesome wearing this? Am I settling for something just because it’s on sale OR am I buying stuff thatmakes ME feel like a billion bucks?
I ask myself so many questions now before buying something that yes, I end up purchasing way less. But man, everything I bring into my home now is something I LOVE. My girlfriends commented on it too.
BFF Emma visited and said, “Damn Claire your closet looks so much more thoughtful.” THANK YOU FOR NOTICING, I literally yelled into the phone. Because instead of filling my wardrobe with stuff I’d just tolerate wearing, I only buy stuff I’d actually dream about wearing. And it makes SUCH a difference.
I think part of the “good enough” problem is because we’re taught to view clothing as NEEDS vs. WANT.
You NEED a certain number of shirts, jeans, boots.
But never are those criteria attached to whether or not those specific shirts, jeans, and boots actually FIT YOU or make you feel good.
Because having a closet full of “meh” clothing is far WORSE than having a lean, mean, wardrobe that only contains pieces that make you smile when you put them on. The other day I was getting ready for work and legitimately laughed when I pulled my outfit together.
You guys. Every piece FIT. And not only that, everything I tried on made me feel amazing.
It shouldn’t be a revelation to feel great in your clothes but honestly? After years of telling myself my average-looking clothes were “good enough,” I forgot what it felt like to love getting dressed. Heads up, I’m NOT saying you need to throw out all your “good enough” clothes and start from scratch.
We could all probably afford that, but it’s just not realistic. But I WILL say that you should at least try on every piece in your closet and ask yourself if it actually makes you happy wearing it. Chances are there are way more “almost” pieces that you love halfway cause you than you think.
And parting with them might be the best thing you ever do for your wardrobe.
