Fair warning: I know exactly when I lost all credibility as a sane person. It was around 9AM on this past Tuesday when I was getting dressed for my day in Brooklyn and looked down at myself pantsless in my mirror. Outfit: a long shirt and tights.
Me to myself: “Yeah, sure, this will be totally weird if I leave the house like this.” But leave the house like this I did – and kept walking around all day for content, y’all. So. Yeah.
That pretty much says it all. It’s not just me who’s been rocking the no trousers look as of late.
Kendall Jenner casually strolling down the streets of SoHo?
Cheque.
Hailey Bieber making wearing exclusively a shirt look effortless? Double cheque.
But when influencers and celebrities do it, it’s chic. Insta-ready. But when I did it… let’s just say it was appropriate weather for my thighs to be exposed, but not appropriate in every other sense.
Blame Instagram. Blame me for sitting on Instagram too much and looking at these crazy street styles thinking I could actually recreate them. Spoiler: I couldn’t.
But I committed – mentally telling myself that spending my Tuesday being judged by complete strangers was exactly what I needed. I paired my top – an oversized cream button-down from Aritzia that hit mid-thigh – with black opaque tights, some chunky loafers, and you-know-whats down below to keep myself legal. Standing in front of my mirror, full outfit assembled, I somehow thought I looked editorial.
Cute. Seasonal. I didn’t freak myself out too badly, which was good because otherwise I never would’ve left my flat.
Then I stepped foot outside and remembered October in New York is nearly synonymous with jumper weather. As soon as I felt the wind hit my legs, I questioned what on earth I was thinking. Where was this sense of confidence coming from?
My local coffee shop was the first place I encountered. I’ve been going there for three years – I basically know the staff by name. Marco, who makes my coffee, took one look at me and his face contorted through about five emotions until he settled on what I can only describe as worried pity. “You forgot something, didn’t you?” he asked kindly. “Oh, uh, I’m working on a story for…I don’t wear trousers sometimes?” I shrugged, unsure of how to break it down to Marco that I wasn’t homeless. “Oh yeah?” he raised an eyebrow. “For the site?” “Yeah,” I nodded. “It’s a trend!” He shook his head, hands flying into the air as he whipped up my usual latte. “You girls are insane,” he said, again another statement coming from a guy who spends his days serving Brooklyn’s creatives.
Coffee shop mode: activate. Sitting on the wooden chair of my usual café made me realise how tough that material can be when you have no trousers on. Oof.
I tried scooting in my seat to see if that felt better, but then I was worried people would think I wasn’t wearing trousers because I was jigging around too much. Then I tried sitting still, but now I looked like a damned ornament. There’s no winning.
My next stop was the grocery store. I’ll never forget this lady – not kidding – who made the sign of the cross when she spotted me grabbing some bananas. She then proceeded to walk right over to me. “Hey there sweetie,” she cackled. “Did you forget to finish getting dressed?” “Um,” I laughed nervously. “No!
This is, like, a thing that people are doing?” I waved my shirt in the air. Her eyes seemed to glide over me as if she was mentally checking for holes in my outfit. “Girl, back in my day we called that a breakdown,” she scoffed. “Get yourself together.” She turned to leave, but not before I caught one last glimpse of her utterly judgmental eyes. The cashier, a teenager, didn’t seem to judge me at all. “Oh trust me, I’ve seen people do this on TikTok all the time,” she told me when I explained what I was doing. “My mum would kill me if I left the house like that, though!” Mums.
When my lunch date Emma – who works in finance, let’s just say she dresses very conservatively – saw me walk into the restaurant I was meeting her at, I don’t think she knew what to say. Eyes widened. Mouth gaped.
You Might Also Like
And then she kinda gave me that “I know you’re up to something silly but I love you anyway” smirk and winked. “What,” she deadpanned, not even attempting to hide her disdain for my outfit. “is going on with your trousers?” “I’m trying this trend thing for an article,” I sputtered. “It’s like a fashion…thing?” She handed me a menu but I didn’t feel very hungry at that moment. “Oh please for the love of God,” she groaned, grabbing her glass of wine. “You know you’re not walking the streets of Paris for Vogue, right? You’re in Brooklyn! At a regular-ass restaurant!” She was right.
And then she went and told me when I last cleaned my hands on public subway seats. Ouch. Our waiter was great about the whole situation.
Polite. Kind. Understandably distracted, though I’ll never forget how he kept his gaze glued to his notepad when taking our order.
I don’t know if he’ll forget me anytime soon, but hopefully he at least texts his roommates about the crazy woman at table six who forgot trousers were a thing. No one tells you about how uncomfortable the no trousers trend truly is. Your legs stick to every surface you possibly can think of.
You can’t sit down without contemplating how you’re positioning your legs for a good five minutes. You feel cold all the time because tights are not trousers, they’re just whispering to you that they’re trousers. And you’re just mentally exhausting yourself, trying to people watch and monitor your own movements so you don’t appear like some homeless freak.
The last place I stopped was the UPS store. It was busy – people in and out loading up on packages. And I was in line when this tiny girl, probably four or five years old, grabbed onto my jacket.
She looked up at me with her little kid eyes and dropped the craziest truth bomb. “Where are your trousers?” Her mother scooped her up quicker than you could blink and shook her head in disappointment. “Lily! We don’t ask strangers about their outfits!” To me she bellowed: “I’m so sorry! She doesn’t know any better!” “It’s okay,” I laughed. “Are you with your mum?” The little girl nodded vigorously. “Well, your mum’s here so that’s good.
You should definitely wear trousers to school though, okay?” She gave me a hug and her mother beamed. “I promise she’ll never do that again,” my new friend’s mother said, mouthed “sorry” to me over and over as she dragged her daughter out. Kids. Bless them.
As I continued to walk home, I had some realizations. One: every single photo of celebrities not wearing trousers is them sitting in their car or stepping out of it. They’re not walking down busy streets for blocks on end or perching themselves on public benches – those photos are curated for a reason.
And two: trust me, I thought this would feel way trendier than it actually does. Seeing other normal people out and about – not just celebrities – really solidified how your location and environment can make or break a trend like this. Three: I’ll never take trousers for granted again.
How comfortable they are. How much coverage they provide. How little I have to think about how I sit or stand when wearing them.
Come to think of it, trousers are pretty GREAT. Slipping on my sweatpants as soon as I got home felt like slipping into a hug.
My editor didn’t believe me when I told her about my day – she simply asked if I’d do it again.
Uhh no?
But maybe if it was slightly warmer out? And shorter shorts?
And at an event where that type of outfit wouldn’t be questioned? We’ll see. For now I think I’ll admire this trend from afar.
Much like how I’ll never not appreciate trousers ever again. When I walked into my coffee shop yesterday wearing jeans that were VERY clearly jeans, Marco laughed in my face. “You found your trousers!” He yelled across the room for everyone to hear. Poor Marco. “Fashion week is officially over,” I responded, sliding him an extra dollar on top of my coffee. “Thank god,” he agreed, already beginning to make my drink. “That was weird, even for you.” And coming from someone who hands thousands of Brooklyn creatives coffee every single day?
Yeah, I think we can all agree that trying to not wear trousers is. Just. Weird.
